With all of the media buzz, I have been thinking about government regulation of our rights especially the abortion hot topic. Should there be regulations on abortion? Yes. But to protect whom?
The unborn child who didn't ask to be here? The young rape victim attacked on her way home from school? The ill mother who risks her life if she gives birth? But what about the woman who just wasn't ready to be a mother, financially or otherwise?
What should be evaluated by the woman before she chooses to have an abortion:
Mental health
Was there a traumatic experience that lead to the pregnancy she's now trying end? Is her reasoning sound (in a logical sense, open minded, but not sociopath sense)? Will the abortion cause more psychological damage than relief?
Affect on the woman's life
Can the woman have the abortion safely? What might the aftermath look like?
Financial capability
can the family afford to have a child?
Circumstances
Why does she need or want to have one?
What should be regulated by the government:
The Timeline
-regulating how late in pregnancy you can safely have an abortion
-once the child is formed and the sex is formed (during month 3), it's probs too late to abort. I don't think it's safe for the mother at this point...and it's kinda gruesome. Like you can see the entire shape of the baby and shit...you should probably just have it and give it up for adoption.
Here's the timeline I referenced.
Where the real problem lies:
Educating our kids about safe sex and birth control
-Schools teaching abstinence-only health education are being negligent. I'm not saying abstinence is not a viable option. However, the fact of the matter is that not educating children is about ALL of their options just means that when they do have sex they will be unprepared. Kids are having sex in high school and sometimes middle school. They should be informed of the risks and responsibilities before they engage in any sex acts in order to encourage a healthy relationship with sex.
-Educating kids about sex and birth control measures also prevents folks from using abortion as a main form of birth control
One of my college roommate's told me a story about a girl who did just that. She got pregnant in high school twice and had an abortion twice...but refused to use a condom because it didn't feel good...or the pill because it would make her fat...
Like I told my sister, "You know what doesn't feel good? CHILD BIRTH! You know what'll make you fat? PREGNANCY!"
GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE! Sorry that story still pisses me off. Now while that is perhaps an extreme case, we must avoid these kinds of situations
Why is everyone trying to regulate women's bodies, but when someone suggests regulating men's bodies it's some big joke?
Did you ever see Legally Blonde? It came out 2001 and starred Reese Witherspoon as a "dumb" blonde on a quest to get her man back after he dumps her. The ex-bf leaves sunny California for Harvard Law and a more sensible type of woman for his future career goals.
In this scene, the students debate a stalking case in which a man seeks to claim parental rights over a child produce from his sperm bank sperm.
Elle: For that matter, any masturbatory emissions, where the sperm is clearly not seeking an egg, could be termed reckless abandonment.
Professor Callahan: You've just won your case.
So let's look at this a sec. Warner's finishing line was without the male's sperm there could be no baby...
What the fuck kinda shit is that? So in my mind I've shifted my thinking to another video. Flash forward. It's 2012 and Republican men seem especially caught up in telling me if I use hormonal birth control I'm a whore and that if I abort I'm a murderer. They want to insist I have zero claim to my body...because it's not about me; it's about the children of the future.
Without my egg there could be no baby.
So legislation is being drawn to regulate what the hell I can and can't do with my body. Like, here's the thing. Just cuz women can get abortions doesn't mean they're gettin em done every time they get pregnant. They don't just wake up and say hey! I'm preggers let's go check out that new abortion clinic that opened up downtown... Abortions don't spell the end of the human race. Give women a lot more credit than that. At the end of the day, if a woman gets pregnant, she has to weigh her options.
She's got to think about what she wants from her life and how a baby would fit into that. She's got to assess whether or not she is able to raise a child and whether the partner is ready/ able to shoulder that responsibility as well. A baby is a RESPONSIBILITY. If you're not in a place to handle it...then sometimes an abortion is the RESPONSIBLE thing to do.
Now. Here come women saying, fuck you! You wanna regulate my body? We're gonna regulate yours. Because after all, without your sperm, there could be no baby.
Sounds a bit like the Legally Blonde clip, no? So yea, it was funny...hee hee hee...it ain't that funny. This what's really happening right now. Men are being forced to think about what if they're body's were being controlled...and they think it's some big fucking joke. The shit ain't funny.
Let's see what Ohio Senator Nina Turner says:
While, this is a bit tongue in cheek, she's hitting on some real points. Men aren't very responsible in how they use Viagra. I know 24 yr old guys with zero erectile problems who've used it just to get that 4 hour erection they mention in the warnings. But the actual point was that women shouldn't need a permission slip to live their lives. I've already said that women shouldn't be using abortion like the pill, but with proper education of all of the methods of birth control girls and women can make educated decisions before and after they get pregnant.
I can see where both sides are coming from. Babies don't have a say when they're conceived or born and we have a right to protect the voiceless. However, we can't afford to overlook the already living breathing, feeling women. What about their voices and needs? The fact that we live in a patriarchal society only hinders the progress on reproductive rights legislation because biological men don't carry babies and therefore any opinion they voice to regulate women's repro rights feels condescending and uniformed. They don't necessarily understand how it feels to be constantly poked and prodded and judged based on their beauty or lack there of. Women's beauty is scrutinized. We have to measure up to a man's standard. Even in lesbian communities, especially those of color, you can see very hetero-normative gender roles/ views of relationships. It's in our magazines. On our TVs. In our day to day lives. We are barraged by images of the "perfect" woman and first analyzed based on everything from our clothes to whether we rid our bodies of hair or not. From birth our parents try to instill feminine sensibilities. With this constant focus on our bodies, it's hard not to be pissed off about men dictating something as big as birthing when they already dictate such minute details.
OK. So I don't know that there'll be a part 2 to this any time soon. But this is what flowed out of my head so far. It just really upsets me that it's not an equal opportunity thing. If women need evaluation before abortions and birth control and all that shit, then men should be evaluated before they are able to purchase Viagra. Erectile Dysfunction (ED) is often a mental problem. Viagra, like abortion, can't be a quick fix. We need to get to the root of the situation before we act. But the main point is neither gender has the right to make decisions for the other and people should try to have a more complete/ objective view of the issue before they take sides.
